Learning in the Best Possible Way
Everyone has their own learning style. Some learn best by reading, others, writing, and still others do best by focused listening. Some, like me use a combination of these methods as well as hands-on, or doing. For me, it often depends on what I’m trying to learn.
When I’ve taken on new software, as inelegant and sometimes inefficient as it might seem, I have to put my fingers on the keys and start poking around. Once I get the lay of the land, I might pick up the documentation to fill in any blanks I’ve encountered, but overall, I simply need to play with the software and put it through its paces with the mindset that it will do whatever I want it to. I just have to figure out how.
Overcoming Resistance to Change
I’m currently trying to overcome my reticence and yes, resistance to marketing myself. I
invested in a program called LeadsLab which you may have seen me mention a time or two. It consists of a series of short videos, some handouts, and assignments. In the beginning, I got frustrated because I lacked what I needed to perform some of the tasks. I was told to skip them, but felt I was somehow missing out.
Then I remembered some advice I’d gotten recently. “Listen to all the videos once through, then go back and listen to them again while doing the assignments.” My ADD brain jumped for joy. Suddenly I didn’t have to stop and start, trying to slog through a bunch of assignments I wasn’t quite ready to tackle. By going through the videos first (including the weekly Q & A) without feeling pressured to do anything, I allowed my brain to wrap itself around the whole program and what I’d be learning before I dove in feet first.
The reason this works for me is I’m not a lineal thinker for the most part. I don’t always want to do things in the prescribed order. Many times, I’m more successful if I set my own order once I understand the end result. Or I might skip a whole section and, as they say, cut right to the chase. When I have to overcome ages old misconceptions like my alleged inability to market myself, sometimes, it suits me better to figuratively jump off the cliff.
Maintaining Forward Momentum
Listening rather than doing gives my brain the opportunity to really listen to what’s being said without thinking “Omygod! Omygod! How am I going to do what he’s telling me I have to do to get to the next stage?” The mental belly flops stop me in my tracks every time. I’ll never get a swan dive out of a frantic run for the side of the pool, limbs a-flailing, and mouth open in a gasp wide enough to swallow a seagull. In that state, I’m too busy worrying about all the “I can’ts” to realize there are so many things I can do, and will once I get out of my own way.
When all else fails, I take a few steps back and take a walk or meditate. Let’s face it, running around in panicked circles never ends well. The crazy part is, I’m simply following advice I used to give my daughter when she was frustrated with her homework and her inability to make sense of it. I’d tell her to walk away and do something else for awhile to clear her head of the muck that was obscuring the pieces of information she needed. Typically, she’d yell and dissolve into tears, but ultimately, she’d walk away and return to successfully complete the task.
Historically, movement has been my go-to when frustration set in. Pissed off at my spouse? Clean out a cupboard. Co-worker being unreasonable or uncommonly dense? Go for a walk. Brain refusing to embrace a new concept? Have a dance off in the living room. Even if all I do is get up, go to the bathroom, and refill my water bottle, I come back with a calmer, clearer perspective. In fact, I’ll use the same principle when a post or chapter I’m working on isn’t coming together. If I get stuck, or it starts feeling like slogging through quicksand, I save the document and walk away for awhile.
Honoring Your Unique Self
Still and all, you have to figure out what works best for you. It doesn’t matter if you’re left-
brained or right-brained. You have a learning style which may encompass traditional methods, but is still unique to you. You have to recognize when something isn’t working, and no matter how hard you try to pound it into your brain, you’re only going to meet with resistance.
In some ways my brain is a teenager; set in it’s ways and refusing to look outside previous experiences for new ways to look at things. I’m constantly reminding it how far we’ve come and how much we’re learning; much of which is as far outside our comfort zone as it’s possible to travel. I’m learning to look past the crossed arms and the set chin to the source of the problem. Typically, it’s fear.
Facing My Fears Head-On
Sometimes, it’s fear of failure, but more often, it’s fear of success. What happens when I have so many people interested in my services I have to decide who to keep and who to turn away? What if I choose wrong? What if I can’t meet a deadline (which is ludicrous as I’m so anal about deadlines I typically beat them!). What if I fail to live up to my side of the bargain. (again crazy given the feedback I’ve gotten lately).
The truth is, all those fears are nothing more than a mind resisting change in the form of forward progress. My brain is comfortable living in a world that’s known, but my heart wants and needs so much more. My best solution is to keep changing things up so my mind gets confused enough to stop resisting, and helps in spite of itself.
Six months ago, I’d have never bought the LeadsLab program. I was too mired in the idea that marketing would never be my thing. I was allowing my brain to run the show and keep me stuck in one place. But watching others overcome their fears, receiving support from members of the community when I needed it (and offering mine when I could), and seeing a few successes showed me it was finally time to take a giant step past my self-limiting beliefs so my heart could realize it’s monumental dreams, a baby step at a time.
I’m still not moving through this new territory comfortably, and I’ll make a lot of mistakes before I get it right, but I’ve opened the door to something new, and in its own way it’s kind of exciting. I love learning new things. It was simply a matter of allowing one of the new things to be something I’d resisted unnecessarily for too long.
About the Author
Sheri Conaway is a writer, blogger, ghostwriter, and an advocate for cats and mental health. Sheri 
believes in the Laws of Attraction, but only if you are a participant rather than just an observer. Her mission is to Make Vulnerable Beautiful and help entrepreneurs touch the souls of their readers and clients so they can increase their impact and their income. If you’d like to have her write for you, please visit her Hire Me page for more information. You can also find her on Facebook Sheri Levenstein-Conaway Author. And check out her new group, Putting Your Whole Heart Forward.
Be sure to watch this space for news of the upcoming releases of ” Rebuilding After Suicide” and “Sasha’s Journey”.
