Evaluating Each Intention
I recently completed a project which, among other things, gave me some tools with which to get myself unstuck, including how to set an intention. Along the way, I also figured out being stuck in what seemed like a holding pattern for a month or so wasn’t entirely a bad thing. None of us can keep pushing forward, with or without obvious results, without taking a break.
The break has several benefits. In the first place, it’s the obvious; rest after a long period of effort, stress, or both. Secondly, it allows you to step back and take an objective look at where you are, where you’ve been, and where you’d like to go. And third, at least if you’re like me, it gives you perspective so you’ll give yourself credit for what you’ve accomplished instead of focusing on what didn’t get done, or how much you missed your expectation target.
All too often, you get mired in the muck, trying to move the immovable, when, if you took a step back, you might realize instead of fighting a losing battle, you could regroup, and reroute. For me, it means looking at my original goals, and the road I’ve taken, and ask:
- Has my original intention been met?
- Have circumstances changed such that the original intention is no longer viable?
- Have I moved so far past the original intention that I missed seeing it manifest altogether, and would be working backwards to try to reconnect with an old path?
Allowing Intentions to Manifest
I’ve learned for each intention I set (and these days, they’re plentiful), there’s more than one 
way it can manifest: the way I see at the point of intention, and the way it occurs after new information, skills, and expectations become part of the equation. Nine times out of ten, I evolve on my way to manifesting such that either the original intention takes a hard left turn without my realizing it, or it becomes a lesson on the way to something better.
One of my many teachers told me, “set your intentions in broad strokes.” What she meant was you don’t want to get mired in the details because your outlook changes with every step; be it forward, backwards, or sideways you take. If you get too set on how you’re going to get where, right now, you think you want to go, you might miss something even better, or a side road that opens up possibilities you can’t even see from your current vantage point.
In allowing my intentions to be less specific, I’ve discovered new options and opportunities hiding around the next turn that are better than anything I dreamed possible until I rounded that bend. By the same token, I don’t get too attached to the new possibilities because they may be merely a stepping stone, and miles away from my final destination.
A Reformed Control Freak
Photo- Alper Çuğun via Flikr
I’ve also learned when I get too attached to an outcome, or too mired in the details, I find myself bogged down, or worse, stuck in a rut until I have the sense to stop, step back, and take a hard look at what I’m doing, and why I’m doing it. If I’m going around in circles, seeming to make no progress, it’s probably because I’m stuck in the details, and digging a deeper hole instead of making forward progress.
In my former life, I was what many call a “control freak”. It’s not a compliment, though once I believed differently. I was so afraid of losing control of my life I had to try to force every detail, and push through every obstacle. It never occurred to me some obstacles are there for a reason; to keep you from heading down a rabbit hole, or tumbling into a painful, and motion-stopping ditch.
Think of the barriers you see on the road, or the bar at a railroad crossing. They’re there to keep you from getting hurt. Obstacles in your life path serve the same purpose. Ignoring or pushing past them will certainly put you in peril. Maybe it won’t be life threatening, but it will certainly put a wrench in your plans. Some things are not meant to be breached. They’re meant to make you stop and find another way around.
A Life of Ease
It took me a long time to figure that out as I tried to bull my way through life. In hindsight, I lost more than I gained for the effort. But no effort is without value. All the times I tried doing things the hard way, I got knocked around, and learned some valuable lessons. Sometimes the lesson was merely a reminder I wasn’t being true to myself; I was trying to stick my abstractly configured self into a square hole that chafed at every angle.
Even so, being a misfit for many years, and struggling to find someplace I belonged, and loved what I was doing gave me the wherewithal to finally cut the ties with the rat race, become the captain of my own ship, so to speak, and create a life where I needed only to fit into my own expectations. In retrospect, I couldn’t have made the leap even five years earlier. When I did, it was with right timing, a few more lessons under my belt, and the ability to set broad, limitless intentions for my future.
Life Lessons Aren’t Comfortable
I’ve been blessed with many teachers along the way, especially since I stopped fighting the 
rapids and learned to float downstream. Some have taught me more about myself. Others have taught me what I don’t want. Both are valuable in their own right.
Sometimes you have to take a few wrong turns so you can rule out what doesn’t fit, especially if you go through a process of reinventing yourself late in life, as I’ve been doing for the last few years.
You have to be willing to get uncomfortable so you can figure out what really does make you comfortable. The expectations of family, friends, and society in general are deeply ingrained from early childhood. Learning you don’t have to honor any expectations you don’t set for yourself is not only freeing, but scary as hell. At first, you feel adrift like you have no navigation system. Eventually you realize you can trust your own gut even if it doesn’t have a GPS or clear directions.
Once you set your intention, any way you go is right. You just have to pick a direction and start moving. In time you will learn to fly!
About the Author
Sheri Conaway is a Holistic Ghostwriter, and an advocate for cats and mental health. Sheri 
believes in the Laws of Attraction, but only if you are a participant rather than just an observer. Her mission is to Make Vulnerable Beautiful and help entrepreneurs touch the souls of their readers and clients so they can increase their impact and their income.
If you’d like to have her write for you, please visit her Hire Me page for more information. You can also find her on Facebook Sheri Levenstein-Conaway Author.
Be sure to watch this space for news of the upcoming releases of ” Rebuilding After Suicide” and “Sasha’s Journey”.
