Draw Your Goals in Broad Strokes
Contrary to popular belief, setting goals is not an exact science, nor is it a time to lock yourself into a position which is inflexible in the face of change. You set your goals based on what you know, and perhaps, your best guess regarding future developments and challenges. Unless you have a reliable crystal ball, there’s no way you can predict what’s around the next bend, or how your own, deep-seated beliefs and coping mechanisms might conspire to thwart you.
The most successful goals are stepping stones towards your more audacious, elaborate dreams. They take into account not only the advantage of many small steps rather than a few giant leaps, but also that you need to assess where you are regularly, and recalibrate as necessary to account for both new information, and a change in the road ahead. Failure to do so leads to frustration, and a long, hard trip on a hamster wheel.
Whether you’re setting a goal, or making a choice, it’s unlikely you have a complete picture of how the choice or goal will impact your life, nor what changes may occur to thwart you, or at least make it more difficult, or costly to continue on the chosen path. Being willing to accept you’ll need to re-evaluate, and modify the original plan more than once increases your chances of achieving the desired results.
Allow Beliefs to Change
Too often, old beliefs or habits instill unnecessary, and potentially self-defeating stubbornness into the choices you make, or the goals you set. When you insist a certain path or method is the only way to get from point A to point B, you choose to ignore what you learn as you take each step on your chosen path. Sure, some of those steps come with a sense of achievement and forward progress, but others contain challenges, and road blocks designed to test your ability to make decisions on the fly, assess new information and knowledge you’ve gained, and tweak your plans accordingly.
Living your dreams is like a chemistry experiment. You set up the experiment, gather those necessary components you’re aware of based on what you already know, and start combining things in accordance with current knowledge. Each time you add an element, you assess the results, making determinations about what works, or improves the compound, and what doesn’t.
If you continue adding things when you discover a weakness or failure, you risk spoiling the entire concoction unless you know in advance the additive strengthens or improves what you already have. More often than not, you find an element that fouls the works, and need to take a step or two back to assess the damage, to either correct what you did, or toss the whole mess and start over. Meanwhile, you’ve added more knowledge to your encyclopedia so neither you, nor others who follow make the same mistakes.
There is No One Way
When you remain focused on doing things a certain way, following one, and only one road, and refusing to accept your original plan was flawed, not because you chose badly, but because there were elements you couldn’t see when you made the choice, your road will be long, hard, and prone to frustration. If the dream isn’t strong enough to withstand the frustration, you’ll eventually cast it aside, perhaps even blaming yourself.
Conversely, allowing for not only the ebb and flow of life in general, but limitations on your ability to see into the future will not only make you more flexible in the face of new information, but allow you to turn temporary road blocks into lessons that improve your chances of success. The lessons you learn along the way are opportunities to broaden your knowledge while testing your ability to remain flexible when faced with new information which could challenge previous beliefs, and might even lead to entirely new ones.
The biggest disservice you can do yourself is believing it’s a straight, unblocked path from where you are now to where you want to be. If the dream is big, you have to expect to be challenged, and even thwarted along the way. Accepting your journey will include switchbacks, setbacks, and even a rock slide or two means you’re willing to thrust, parry, retreat, or reanalyze when new information invariably becomes available.
Review, Assess, Modify
When you began your journey, you may have only seen one road to achieving your dreams. Yet, the further you’ve traveled towards the dream, the more you’ve seen other roads lead away from your chosen path. Some of them clearly take you away from your goals. Others aren’t so clear. Even the one you’re on isn’t always the best route, though it looked like a direct path when you started out.
Maybe the road itself peters out, or was washed away, or otherwise blocked. Perhaps a stop for gas and supplies gave you an opportunity to talk to someone going in the opposite direction who provided information the maps and guidebooks lacked. Often, you learn something about yourself which leads to a reassessment of the end goal, or what you’re willing or able to do to get there.
You have to remember there are no wrong choices. Making changes after you’re underway is an indication you’re learning and growing. The only one who can lock you into a trajectory is yourself, and even if you do, it might turn out to be harder to steer into the wind, than to allow it to alter your course. So ask yourself if sticking to your chosen path is worth fighting for every inch of ground you gain.
Enjoy the Journey
Can you accept the possibility that dreaming your dream is enough to convince the Universe, God, or whatever Powers that Be might guide you to help you along the way? Are you willing to see some of the setbacks and challenges as opportunities to release control, and allow that force or power to guide you for awhile so you can watch, listen, and learn? Can you be the passenger instead of the driver for a little while, and simply admire the scenery?
I learned the hard way how many opportunities are missed when you hyper-focus on an outcome without allowing for course corrections along the way. When you’re always trying to control the situation, you miss the chance to learn, grow, and improve on the original dreams. Most of all, you miss out on the pleasure of the journey when all you can see is the destination.
About the Author
Sheri Conaway is a Holistic Ghostwriter, and an advocate for cats and mental health. Sheri 
believes in the Laws of Attraction, but only if you are a participant rather than just an observer. Her mission is to Make Vulnerable Beautiful and help entrepreneurs touch the souls of their readers and clients so they can increase their impact and their income.
If you’d like to have her write for you, please visit her Hire Me page for more information. You can also find her on Facebook Sheri Levenstein-Conaway Author.
Be sure to watch this space for news of the upcoming releases of ” Rebuilding After Suicide” and “Sasha’s Journey”.
