Crushing blow, or golden opportunity?
As we move through our lives, learning lessons, filling our virtual tool box, experiencing the gamut of emotional ups and downs, we are also, as I’ve mentioned before, evolving. As I ponder the last few days when it became apparent that the rewrite of my book was going to be a far larger task than I’d envisioned (ignorance is, indeed, bliss!), I recognized a few changes in myself which, without this little setback, might never have caught my attention. These changes have a lot to do with how and why I was able to walk away from a job that paid well though it was killing me slowly inside, to take a wild chance on the unknown. I realized that I had to reach the point where I could handle rejection and even complete and brutal critical opinions of my work without taking the criticism as if my entire being were in question. A point where seemingly stupid things like the number of spaces after a period were even worth doing anything more than correcting the problem and moving on. A point where I could weed through the criticisms and understand that we all have are our own perspectives, and I do NOT have to completely adhere to that of someone else, but can still find great value in what they’re willing to share. Until I had evolved enough to get to that enlightened state, I would let my emotional attachment to the words on a page prevent me from learning and growing.
In short, I realized that it wasn’t until I learned, not only how to find the lesson in adversity, but also, how to turn it into an asset, that I was ready, on an emotional level, to take the plunge into the creative world for which my heart truly yearned. Not only am I now able to absorb the lessons, I’m also able to recognize when it’s time for me to take a couple of steps back, assimilate what I’ve learned and disconnect it from anything personal, whether it be from me or someone else and their perspective. I have my friend, Judy to thank for helping me connect the dots today. While one person might see a word or phrase from their own perspective and experience as wrong, that doesn’t make it so. But I also have to take the time to gain at least a rudimentary understanding of that person’s perspective and how it developed. Ultimately, I reach the same conclusion, no matter what the situation: neither of us is wrong, we’re just different, and isn’t diversity what makes the world so interesting?
A new perspective is simply an opportunity for us to change our own perspective and bring in the Laws of Attraction.
So, this latest little hitch in my giddy-up gave me pause for a moment before I had to ask myself: “Just what is it you want? Where do you want to go and who do you want to be?” and the answer came back loud and clear: “I want to be a writer, a published author. I want to be a teller of tales which will entertain, a sharer of experiences that will inform, and perhaps help someone better handle what I had to learn on my own.” The first step towards realizing that goal (aside from revising my first novel, of course) is to believe in myself; more, to believe that I already have my heart’s desire. So I set up my Author page on Facebook, something I’d been putting off until I truly believed it was so. I created a signature for my email, announcing to myself and to the world that I am, indeed, an Author/Blogger. As Judy so aptly put it, I am embracing my goals as if they already exist. I am already grateful for those who have helped me achieve those goals, and for the lessons I learned along the way. I love what I’m doing, the life I’m living, the lives I’m touching.
Here is where the Universe puts its two cents in.
As I am loving and embracing and expressing gratitude, the Universe comes along to add its own little touch to the mix. Suddenly, my accounting workload is increasing, slowly, at first, but noticeably. As I look more closely, I realize that it is just the cushion I need while I take the time to get this first book into shape so that it can truly be successful, rather than a rush job that falls flat. The extra accounting work will give me more time to write. I know that sounds contradictory, but if I don’t have to depend on the writing to pay the bills for now, I can actually devote more time and energy to doing it well and doing it right.
Returning to the original topic of this post (assuming I ever stay on topic anyway!), as we learn and grow, as we become less influenced by what other people say and think, as we learn to take the guidance without taking it personally, we open ourselves up to opportunities we couldn’t even imagine earlier in our learning cycle. Above all, we learn that dreams really do come true, but they will, only when we truly believe that they already have!
My gratitudes tonight are:
1. I am grateful for my heart’s desire, my career as a writer.
2. I am grateful for the people in my life who challenge, support, encourage, constructively criticize and ultimately, just believe in me.
3. I am grateful for having emerged from my shell to expand my social connections.
4. I am grateful for the time and the space to write what I need to, and revise until it is worth reading by the masses.
5. I am grateful for abundance: love, encouragement, motivation, ambition, confidence, guidance, opportunities, fortuitous events, harmony, peace, health and prosperity.