Today, I wrote my blog post in the morning as I planned to spend the rest of the day working on my book, going to the gym and running a couple of errands.  Yet, it’s now 10PM and here I sit, feeling like there’s still something I’m supposed to be doing.  The only explanation I can find for this is that I have become a blog-a-holic!  I can’t go to sleep without my nightly fix!

What’s a girl to do but write some more?  The trouble is, I’ve already used up the blog topics I’d stockpiled, so I have to find something else to write about tonight!

I did get a lot of work done on my book, though very little of it was actual writing.  In fact, the sum total of my writing today was 13 lines!  What I did get done was to finish copying my blog to a word document and start skimming through it for pieces I can use in my book.  I got maybe a third of the way through, but the first few months didn’t really have anything useful.  I’m guessing the last 2/3’s will take a bit longer!  Though I suppose it will help to do things in their proper order, despite the fact that today’s blog hits was an amazing 95!!! 

I hoped to gain some inspiration from other bloggers, but my mind is too caught up in my book right now, I think.  As I sit here, fingers poised, my brain is going off in a totally different direction, organizing notes from my blog, attempting to get the chapter I have been rolling around into my manuscript document before I start chopping out some of the whiny, blamey stuff that made me stop writing in the first place. 

As usual, I start to write with a thought in mind, and new discoveries are made as the words start coming out.  I’ve already, in the 13 lines I’ve written, managed to drift away from the original thought I was trying to follow.  This should make for an interesting couple of days as I try to get something coherent written, despite the fact that I know I’ll be going back to edit anyway. 

I think I need to learn to approach my book the way I write my blog.  If my ADHD takes over, I need to just give it free reign for now and do my cleanup later.  But it’s really hard to do that when I have the thing all nicely laid out in double-spaced manuscript format.  Could it be that I’m intimidating myself with structure?  Do my structureless babbles promote better creativity and allow the thoughts I’m trying to convey to come out more freely?  Thankfully, part of my process right now is to go through my blogs and pull out those babbles because, as the blog’s purpose originally mirrored the book, I have, over the years, injected a lot of my thoughts for the book into it. 

Some of the things I’ve pulled out so far are something of a stretch and the likelihood of their being included in the manuscript are slight, but as I never really know where I’m going until I’ve gotten there, it’s possible that the ones I think are a stretch right now may really be taking me down a path which needs to be followed when all is said and done.  How do authors outline a story?  I can’t even imagine having a complete book all figured out except for the details and dialogue!  I’m more of the “start the story and let it go where it wants to” kind of writer.

As I was reading through Writers’ Digest a couple of weeks ago, the author discussed query letters and paragraphs which hook the reader.  The one thing I think I’ve actually accomplished in the last couple of days is to write that paragraph (not that I’m likely to leave it as-is, but I do have a start on it which makes me rather jazzed!). 

So tonight I’ll do some more organizing and tomorrow, I’ll try to give my brain the freedom it deserves to create without worrying about structure.  Perhaps I’ll manage more than 13 lines!  (this from a woman who had promised herself, at one point, 2000 words a day!) 

I’m the type of person who typically reads three or four books at a time, jumping from one to another as my interest level dictates.  I’m beginning to wonder if, eventually, I’ll be writing the same way.  I can really see me plugging along, then getting stuck on one set of characters so I use another set to clear my head. 

In the meantime, I got my gym workout in, re-stocked the cat sand and dry food and actually ate a meal today instead of just grabbing stuff out of the freezer or cupboard which could be eaten while I created!  Tomorrow I’ll get a break mid-day to get my nails done and go to the gym which should leave me much fresher for the evening writing session.  (and maybe I’ll avoid the blog withdrawals at the same time by waiting until tomorrow night to post again.  Of course, that will depend a lot on whether or not I have more crazy dreams tonight!)

My gratitudes tonight are:
1. I am grateful for 3 days of quiet time to organize, write and get my workouts in.
2. I am grateful for the company of my cats who do little more than hang close or rub against my legs when they know I’m working on something important.
3. I am grateful for air conditioning as the days are warming up again and I don’t do well when I’m overheated.
4. I am grateful for epiphanies of which I’ve already had a couple today, and suspect there will be more over the next 2 days.
5. I am grateful for learning to avoid pointless arguments.

Love and light.

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