Tonight is one of those nights when I sit down to write and my brain is utterly blank.  Not a single interesting thought bounces around in that sometimes vacant place I laughingly refer to as the control center.  At the moment, it is merely controlling the necessary functions for keeping this human machine alive, but does not appear to be inclined to exert itself any further than that.  This comatose while awake state may not be doing me a lot of good, but the furry children are quite pleased as it means that about the only thing I’m good for is to be a warm place for them to sleep which also scratches a cheek or strokes a back on occasion.  From a cat’s point of view, add in feeding, and this is the perfect organism for them! 

I did manage to arouse myself enough to get the sandboxes emptied, scrubbed and refilled and the rest of the trash taken out for tomorrow’s pickup since my plea, albeit a weak one, for a trash fairy went unanswered.  I have to believe that they were far too busy helping people who really needed it and knew that I wouldn’t go to bed with the task undone.  I am grateful that I am self-sufficient and don’t really need to depend on fairies, trash or otherwise, to accomplish the tasks which need to be done around here. 

That thought being released allows my mind to wander aimlessly once again, acknowledging, one minute the head butting I’m receiving from my 15 year old cat, Patches, who, for my dance friends, reminds me a bit of Bonnie.  Old, demanding, a little cranky and very set in her ways, not to mention her “screw with me at your own peril” attitude.  As my mind wanders, so do my eyes and they slide across the shelf above my monitor where over a dozen tarot decks are stored along with books about tarot, kabbalah, laws of attraction and other inspirational texts.  Somehow, several years worth of Turbo Tax have also wound up on that shelf, perhaps as a subtle reminder that I need to get the deed done soon. 

And since I’m on the subject of my library, I look around the somewhat jumbled shelves to see “Joys of Yiddish” snuggled up to “Thinking Like Your Editor”, “Dead Aim” and “Syndrome X”.  The only thing they have in common to have them sharing a shelf is that they happen to be hard cover books instead of paperbacks.  I did try, at one point, to organize my collection, putting all of Norah Roberts’ books on a top shelf, but once they were three deep and two high and I still had more of her books to shelve, I gave up the task as being just too impossible until I can build my two story library!  Meanwhile, the Encyclopedia Brittanica is now in a box so that the shelves can be used to get more of the books off of the floor and every available flat surface (which, by the way, is only an invitation for the kitty olympics to exercise their book scattering gymnastics skills) and I brought another free standing bookshelf in to accommodate still more.  I admit it.  I’m a book-aholic but I have no plans to seek a cure.  I am, at least, getting some of my books for my iPad now to save a little shelf space and limit the havoc wreaked by the kitty olympics.

Reading has been a passion of mine for as long as I can remember, and I made a point of sharing that passion with my daughters.  We spent many an evening snuggled on the couch or my bed, each of us engrossed in our latest selection.  I think, in some ways, I like the disorganization of my library because it forces me to search for a book I know I have, and in the search, I am sure to run across other treasures I just have to read or re-read.  Over the years, I’ve gone through three copies of Lord of the Rings and two of Heinlein’s Job just because they were favorites that I read to death.  Another of those is Time Enough for Love which I really need to locate and read again!  Nothing like a little hunting expedition in my own home!  

A long post tonight or even one with some deep meaning is just not meant to be.  ADHD brain is in full gear and my lack of focus is even starting to annoy me, so I’ll end with my gratitudes and save us all from my endless rambling.

1. I am grateful for my self-sufficiency.
2. I am grateful for my aches and pains as they remind me that I am still alive and able to do most things for myself.
3. I am grateful for cat purrs which lull me to sleep every night.
4. I am grateful for friends I have now and friends I have yet to meet.
5. I am grateful for life’s changes as they keep me alert and interested.

Love and light.

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