As we visited Chinatown yesterday, Heather and I were discussing the fact that the Chinese year of the Snake signifies a continuation of the changes we have been experiencing for the last year or so, but nothing brings that home to me more strongly than when I hear about people who have left this plane having determined that they finished what they came here for, or that they are not part of the next series of changes. In the last few days, I’ve read of the passing of three people who are noteable publicly and one who was noteable to most who met him.
As I was reading about the fourth one this morning, I found myself remembering the old adage about deaths coming in threes, and if you only count the three who were known publicly for one reason or another, that seems to be true. But then I find myself thinking, “why three?”. It is also said that when casting spells, it is important to remember that what you send comes back to you “three times three”. So there is the three again. And again I ask, what is so special about the number three? Why was it picked as a reference point? (and as I type this, I realize that I’ve gone completely off topic of what had me starting this post today! ADHD is surely ruling my life today!)
As I search the net for the significance of the number three, I am led off on another tangent as I read my horoscope for today (which I do more for entertainment than because I believe in its accuracy), but today’s really hits home so I’m sharing it as I may include it in today’s discussion, assuming I don’t go off on yet another tangent!
You may consider re-evaluating your career path and making big changes
as the Sun journeys through your 10th House of Status during the next
four weeks. You have an opportunity to become more aware of your place
in the world now. However, you might quickly regret letting this chance
slip by, so make up your mind to take action while there’s still time.
Thankfully, you could see positive results sooner than you think if you
can visualize your way to success.
How’s that for a thought-provoking concept??? I can’t help but give it at least a little of my attention over the next few weeks, regardless of where I’m at in my career!
At any rate, I got a bit bogged down in my search for threes when I came upon a site which looked back into ancient history, referencing trios of Greek Gods, Triads, and the more modern “Holy Trinity”. I remember from mathematics that a tripod is an extremely stable construct. Does that also hold true for humanity? And what does that mean for the old adage, two’s company, three’s a crowd? Are there some situations where three might not be so stable? Or is two alone really a single unit looking for two more to make it stable? As I have not traveled in a couple for a long time, I have no idea whether couples typically travel in twos, threes or forty-sevens for that matter. But it makes me curious as to what number works best, or, to be fair, if there really is such a number or if it is simply dependent on the parties involved?
As I switched loads of laundry, I continued pondering the nature of three and it occurred to me that even the kids drift towards it at times. They include me in a lot of their activities and even invited me to share Valentine’s dinner with them (which I politely declined as there are some things I believe they should do by themselves!) Granted, the three of us usually have a good time together, but is it more than that? And what happens if/when I find someone of my own? Further, the girls and I had a three dynamic for years as we were usually together and doing things, just the three of us. Although that changed when Jenni moved out, and Heather and I did very well developing our two dynamic, she tended, during those years, to have a boy in her life more often than not, even if the current boy was more a learning experience than part of the three. In fact, her husband is the only one who really fit into the three dynamic almost as if he was born for the position. Chance or design?
Now that I’ve drifted so far from the original topic that I hardly remember what I intended to ponder, it’s time to go full circle and revisit that plot line, especially since my ADHD seems to be operating on high today! Although I overslept again, thanks to my darling Toby, I have still managed to get the car into the shop, get laundry going, straighten up the kitchen (or at least most of the way before I got distracted again), clean out a drawer in my desk while looking for a needle and thread to reattach a button before I did laundry, respond to several FB posts and do some research.
The original thought, though, was change and people making the transition when their job here is done. Those who have been following my blog for any length of time will recognize this line of thought as I revisit it somewhat frequently. It was, in fact, the underlying reason why this blog began as notes on FB in the first place. Having hit a stall in the writing of my book, I decided to keep writing by just spilling whatever came to mind via blog, and this, my friends, is the rather verbose result. But the VERY original intent for beginning to write again was to come to terms with my parents’ suicides, one in 1993 and the other in 2003. And NOW, I’m back to the original topic! Whew! Kind of brings new meaning to my favorite phrase “in 10,000 words or more”, doesn’t it? Small wonder I’m rarely at a loss for words, is it? If my theory is true, and my mind connects with the Universe when I sit down to write, I truly have an endless source of thoughts, ideas, and yes, words! (and once again, my train has jumped the track!)
Reeling myself back in, this is the year of the Snake, and, as such, is a continuation of last year’s changes and progressions. People come and people go. Wishes are fulfilled and wishes are altered, but above all, progress is made. The U.S. has elected a President and the choice has made some happy, some ambivalent and others, downright incensed. Thankfully, in our country, that’s still allowed! Frankly, I, personally, don’t really believe that how our country is run is truly part of the overall changes which have been in progress on a Universal level for a few years now. Certainly, we are impacted by decisions made or not made, but in the overall scheme of things, politics is in the world of the mundane and is little more than a pimple on the butt of the Universal mind. I believe that the individual arrivals and departures of Spirits having a Human Experience are of far more consequence. Those who have recently moved on and of whom I am aware each touched many lives, some artistically, some as teachers and some as advocates for others. I find myself wondering if, as they made the decision to leave, they decided that they had left us with enough tools to carry on, enough inspiration and enough desire to continue what they started?
Thinking back on when each of my parents left, I know that I didn’t feel any of those things, but then, it’s more difficult when you’re too close to the situation and feeling hurt, bewilderment, anger, confusion and a multitude of other emotions. But even as I’ve worked to come to terms with their deaths, accepting the fact that their decisions to be done were right for them, I didn’t really stop to think about whether they felt that they’d thought about whether they’d touched the lives they had with sufficient resources to carry on their work. The fact is, I didn’t even consider that they had had specific work which needed to be perpetuated. Now I ask myself, “why not?”. Why didn’t I consider the fact that my parents, like everyone else in this world, both well known and not, has work they came here to do, lives they came here to touch and legacies they came here to leave? To my knowledge, they didn’t touch as many lives as the Jeff Cottons, Debbie Fords and Mindy McCreadys of the world have, but if you figure in the six degrees of separation, who am I to say they didn’t?
As I consider my own family with whom I have had little or no contact since my mother’s death, I really have to consider how having my mother in their lives for that brief moment in time impacted who they are and how they interact with others like her. Did they, like me for so long, become hardened and insensitive to others who faced her challenges, or did they, from the distance they enjoyed, make choices which would ease the paths for others? If the latter, did they ever make the connection to the source of their humanitarian efforts, or just chalk it up to their own sensitivity? I find that it doesn’t matter, either way, to me. I am only grateful that the sacrifices she made in the life which, I know now, she chose for herself, will bring positive results for someone else along the way.
My Dad, on the other hand, leaves me no doubt of his continuing legacy. I see him in the man my daughter married and in my friend, Ron who both share his sense of humor, his wit, his strength and his loyalty. I see it when I share memories with my daughter and old friends, and when I, with brutal honesty, look at my own strengths and weaknesses. He inspired loyalty and longevity in his friendships which is something I’m still aspiring to, and touched more lives than I know. He just wasn’t one to talk about the things he did or the people he helped in an effort to fulfill the plans he made before coming to earth in the form of my Dad. From him, I also learned, and passed on to my daughter, to be overly responsible for my own actions, or as I like to call it, “responsible to a fault”. Heather picked it up from me and both of us tend to err on the side of taking on too much responsibility for a situation, although that doesn’t always flow through to interpersonal relations, I’m afraid. Too often, we both feel targeted by someone instead of trying to figure out what it is we are doing to attract someone else’s negative behaviour. I’m working on this, with mixed success, but I think Heather has to continue adding to her experiences before she turns that corner. Luckily, we both have imaginary heart shaped confetti in the meantime!
Now that I’ve managed to get my thoughts out, albeit in as convoluted a manner as possible, I need to let things percolate in my brain for awhile and move on to some mindless tasks for awhile.
My gratitudes today are:
1. I am grateful for my writing skills and connection with Source which allow me to pull my thoughts out and examine them as if under a magnifying glass in order to better understand myself.
2. I am grateful for mindless tasks which allow my brain to continue examining uninterrupted.
3. I am grateful for the ability to jump from topic to topic, eventually returning to the original idea or problem with new insight.
4. I am grateful for my ADHD friends who understand that my though process is anything but linear.
5. I am grateful for imaginary heart shaped confetti when all other attempts to understand or accept fail.
Love and light.